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Saturday, July 2, 2011

Dumb Conversation

I have been trying to introduce my kids to the Xmen series that T and I grew up with. One of my pet peeves has always been when people talk in movie theaters or when people talk when I am trying to watch something. That being said, it is almost the end of our block leave, and my mom has been encroaching on our family time by initiating pointless conversations when we are trying to watch things together. I just want some time alone wth my husband and my sons.

My mom and I have a very troubled history; she put me in foster care when I was fifteen, and she wanted nothing to do with me for three years. The only thing positive that happened to me during those years was that I met T. Now she acts like she wants to be my best friend, but she was not there when I needed her most. She lives with me now, and I take care of her because I believe there is a God that I will face someday to whom I must give an explanation for my actions and because it's the right thing to do. No one said right equals easy, but some days are harder than most.

It's hard when someone wants to pretend like your past never happened, like a simple apology has the power to reset all the hell you've experienced. For me, I fear it may be too little, too late.

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