A Wake Up Call That Was Worth It!

Today I got one of the most awesome wake up calls ever! Tony is back! He got back safe, and as an added bonus, I got to see him today.

Now it's a question of waiting on the green machine to get everything in place and let him come home to me.

In other awesome news, my engagement ring finally fits again. Good thing, because I need to get my wedding ring and my anniversary ring resized.

Losing It (the weight, that is)

Today I woke up to find I am exactly one hundred pounds away from my goal weight.

This means I have lost 31 pounds since 6 Feb this year.  I am proud of myself.  At times it's been hard to stay motivated, especially when measurements have fluctuated so wildly.

But I have done it.  Slowly, but surely, and with no gimmicks of fad diets.  The main thing I have discovered on this journey is that portion control is key to getting me back where I want to be.

I feel healthier, and I am learning to love myself again.  It has been a long time since I even LIKED me, let alone LOVED.

Shrinking Me

I am so excited! I lost another 1.6 pounds.  That puts me just ten pounds away from where I wanna be at the end of the summer! 

I have made myself a healthy breakfast this morning.  A cup of Special K Fruit & Yogurt cereal with ground flaxseed and a cup of nonfat milk.

For lunch, I am planning on having a Healthy Choice meal, but I haven't decided which one yet.

I am dressed and ready to go to the airport.  I am nervous again.  Somehow, I think I looked better yesterday, even though I am wearing the same exact thing today.

Get Busy Living, or Get Busy Dying

The title above is a line from one of my favorite movies, "The Shawshank Redmption." I can't think of any other quote that can frame the struggle to be healthy better. I decided last December that instead of making New Year's resolutions that are an excercise in failure and futility, that I was simply going to declare 2011, The Year of Me. This eloquent statement comes down to one very simple fact: this is the year when I take responsibility for my choices, my well-being, and my health. I have been beyond overweight for some time now, and in December, when I could no longer walk to my mailbox without feeling like I was going to die from the shortness of breath, I decided to do something about it.

Thus, my intiative was born. I started making appointments for dental surgeries I knew I needed but put off because I am terrified of dentists. I forced myself to go, even though I gripped the dentist's chair so tight, I'm sure the mark of my fingernails is still there. Phase One of my plan was the dental work, which started in January but is ongoing. I'm still scared, but I still go.

Phase Two started in February, (February 6th) and it involves me getting serious about losing weight. On February 6th, I weighed myself and discovered I weighed 266 lbs. I got upset, had a good cry, and began to research information about weight loss. I found an application on my phone that helped me get started. I lost some weight, but I wasn't too happy with the results. In looking at reviews for the application I was using, I found a review that recommended another one, and I decided to give the new app a try. I started using the new app, called MyFitnessPal, on March 23rd. Since then, I have lost
7 lbs. for a total of 23 lbs. I am still working on it. I didn't get this way overnight, and I know I won't get back to healthy overnight. By the way, I wasn't compensated for mentioning the name of the app I used; I mentioned it out of a desire to help other people feeling hopeless and frustrated with their weight.

My whole point in writing this is to discuss my frustration with my mom, who is fifty-nine, morbidly obese (as am I at my current weight), and a Type II diabetic. She is the kind of person who makes excuses for everything; it's always someone else's fault that things happen to her. I told her about my program, which is one hundred percent free to join and she tells me she won't join because she will only be allowed to eat a few calories. This mentality infuriates me. She has a disease that has serious complications, that can be more easily managed with a modest weight loss, and she is being offered free tools to help her and she still won't even try? Why? Isn't this a no-brainer?

I finally goaded her into participating; remember the too few calories she was griping about? Turns out, according to her weight loss profile, she needs to eat 1900 calories a day. That's more than I'm allowed to eat! The point is, people...we need to take responsibility for ourselves and stop passing the buck.

P.S. I'm TheUnforgyvn on MyFitnessPal, if anyone wants to add me.